You can prepare well and still walk out of a room feeling small.
You polished the deck. You practiced the flow. You kept your timing tight. You showed up ready. Then someone asks, “So what changes after this?” and your confidence wobbles—not because you lack skill, but because you prepared for the wrong thing.
That question isn’t an attack. It’s a request for safety. They’re not judging your talent. They’re trying to reduce risk.
The real product isn’t the talk
When you’re a speaker—or any professional who presents—it’s easy to think the “product” is performance. If you speak well, people will be impressed. If they’re impressed, they’ll buy in.
But decision-makers don’t live in a world of applause. They live in a world of targets, deadlines, complaints, politics, and messy follow-through. Your talk becomes valuable only when it creates movement in that world.
Once you see that, you stop asking, “How do I look?” and start asking, “What improves because I’m here?”
A good talk that didn’t go anywhere
A speaker friend once delivered a session that people clearly enjoyed. During the Q&A, participants were taking photos of the slides like they were souvenirs. On the feedback form, someone wrote, “Best speaker we’ve had this year.”
After the session, the organizer smiled, shook his hand, and said, “Thanks, we’ll update you.”
Then… nothing.
No follow-up. No second booking. No rollout to other teams. It was as if the talk happened in a separate universe from the company’s real work.
The session created a moment. It didn’t create a result the organizer could defend.
That’s the uncomfortable truth: your talk can be loved and still be irrelevant to the person who signs the approval.
The question that changes things
This is the part professionals miss.
A client says, “We want a talk on leadership.”
Most speakers respond with topics. They start listing modules. They start selling the menu.
A results-driven speaker asks one question: “What should be different on Monday morning?”
Now the client has to tell the truth. They’ll say something like: “Managers stop escalating small issues.” “Supervisors give feedback instead of avoiding it.” “People take ownership without being chased.”
That one question turns “leadership” from a vague topic into a measurable outcome.
And when you know the outcome, you can finally create value.
The Value Lens Tool
Use this before any talk, meeting, proposal, or performance review. This keeps you from drifting into self-promotion and pulls you back to what matters.
THE VALUE LENS (5 minutes)
1) Result
What should change because of this? Say it in plain language.
Not “a great session.” Not “engagement.” A real shift: fewer escalations, faster decisions, clearer ownership, better service recovery.
2) Proof
What evidence shows I can help create that change?
Not just stage time. Real work counts: problems solved, systems improved, teams guided, messy situations handled, lessons earned the hard way.
3) Path
What will people do within 24–72 hours?
One script. One checklist. One meeting habit. One decision rule. Small enough to try. Clear enough to repeat.
If you can’t answer #3, you’re still performing.
If you can, you’re building value.
Selling without selling: diagnose first
Credibility questions can make you shrink if you treat them like an exam.
“How many talks have you done?”
“Who are your clients?”
“Can you send your profile?”
If you answer those like you’re defending yourself, you’ll sound like you need permission. But if you diagnose first, you’ll sound like a partner.
Here are three signature diagnostic questions you can carry into any high-stakes conversation:
- “What result do you want people to produce after this?”
- “What’s the cost if nothing changes?”
- “Where do people get stuck right now—decision, follow-through, or ownership?”
These questions do something to the room. They shift the energy from evaluation to collaboration.
That’s what “selling without selling” looks like.
What to say when they ask for topics
Clients will still ask, “What topics can you cover?”
Don’t fight the question. Upgrade it.
Try this:
“Happy to share topics, but the better starting point is the result. What do you need to change—behavior, decisions, or performance? Once we’re clear on that, I can recommend the most useful approach.”
That line keeps you from becoming a menu.
It positions you as a guide.
A different pressure arena: the performance review
This isn’t just for speakers.
This shows up in performance reviews too.
Your boss asks, “So what have you done this quarter?” and you feel the urge to list everything—hours, tasks, late nights, sacrifices. You want to prove you worked hard.
But the boss isn’t buying effort. They’re buying impact.
So you breathe, you use the Value Lens, and you answer in outcomes: “Here’s what improved, here’s what changed, here’s what I solved, and here’s what I’m building next.”
Same work. Different framing. More trust.
Save this: value-killers and upgrades
Sometimes you lose the room not because you’re wrong, but because you sound like you’re performing.
Stop saying this → Say this instead
- “Here are the topics I can cover…” → “Here’s what will improve after we do this…”
- “Let me share my background…” → “Before that—what result do you need?”
- “I have a deck prepared…” → “Here’s the change we’re aiming for…”
- “Let me know your thoughts…” → “Here’s my recommendation based on your goal…”
You don’t need to sound grand.
You need to sound useful.
The practical habit: lead with the result
If you want one behavior that changes how people perceive you, do this:
Lead with the result, not your résumé.
Start your next conversation with a sentence like:
“Let’s clarify the result first. If we’re clear on success, I can connect my experience to what matters most.”
That’s how professionals speak when they want to be trusted.
Not because they’re trying to impress.
Because they’re trying to help.
Your 24-hour challenge
Think of one upcoming conversation where you usually try to be impressive—a pitch, a meeting update, a performance review, a proposal defense.
Before it happens, use the Value Lens. Write the result in one sentence, choose one piece of proof from real work, and propose one small next step.
Then walk in and lead with the result.
Don’t chase applause.
Chase Monday.
If your team is stuck in meetings, misalignment, or slow decisions…
Let’s design one shift they can use immediately.
→ Shift Experiences
