Several years ago, I sat in a conference hall as a well-known executive took the stage. His slides were flawless—minimalist design, sharp graphs, clear data points. His voice carried the rhythm of a seasoned speaker, each sentence polished like it had been rehearsed a hundred times. He didn’t stumble. He didn’t ramble. He delivered exactly as expected: articulate, controlled, eloquent.
But 15 minutes in, I looked around the room.
Heads were nodding politely. Some people were typing on their phones. Others were whispering quietly to colleagues. The room wasn’t with him. He was speaking beautifully, but nobody was moved.
Later that afternoon, another speaker walked up. She wasn’t as polished. She paused often, searching for words. At times she repeated herself. But then she told a story about a decision that nearly cost her team their jobs. Her voice cracked as she described the night she couldn’t sleep, terrified she had failed her people.
And suddenly, the room leaned in.
Not because of eloquence. But because of resonance.
This is the trap many leaders fall into: believing that to win attention, you must be eloquent. You must sound like the great orators. You must polish every phrase. But eloquence alone rarely moves anyone. What people actually listen for is something deeper—trust, emotion, and clarity.
What Audiences Really Crave
If you strip communication down to its essence, people are listening for three things:
- Do I trust you?
- Do I feel something?
- Do I know what to do with what you’re saying?
That’s it.
Eloquence can help. A strong voice, polished delivery, smooth words—these may make your speech easier to hear. But they are not the reason people remember you.
- Trust is built when people sense you’re real. If they suspect you’re putting on a performance, they pull away.
- Emotion creates memory. We don’t remember long lists of points. We remember how we felt when someone spoke.
- Clarity creates traction. If your message can’t be summarized in one short line, people won’t know what to carry home.
Think about the speeches that shaped you. Chances are, it wasn’t the most eloquent one. It was the one that made you feel understood.
Authenticity Over Eloquence
There’s a reason people forgive mistakes when a speaker is authentic. They’d rather listen to someone stumble over words than someone who hides behind perfection.
I once coached a young manager who was terrified of public speaking. “I’m not like those polished TED speakers,” she told me. “I lose my words. I speak too fast. I feel like everyone can see how nervous I am.”
I asked her to tell me about a moment when she felt proudest of her team. She began hesitantly: “Well… last year we had this crisis. Our systems crashed right before a client presentation.” She stumbled, laughed nervously, then added: “I thought it was over. But my team stayed up all night. They improvised solutions. The next day, the client said it was the best presentation they’d ever seen.”
Her voice cracked a little on that last sentence. And in that vulnerability, the audience felt her pride.
Afterward, someone from the back said: “That’s why I want to work with leaders like her.”
Notice what happened. She didn’t wow them with perfect phrasing. She moved them with sincerity.
Authenticity builds trust before your message even lands. Audiences forgive clumsy sentences, awkward pauses, even nervousness—because they can see themselves in you. What they won’t forgive is insincerity.
Exercise: Your Authenticity Map
Take five minutes to write down:
- One belief you hold about your work.
- One value that shapes your decisions.
- One vulnerability (a mistake, failure, or fear) you’re willing to share.
These three elements form your Authenticity Map. They are the anchors of resonance.
Emotion Is the Engine
In 1995, neuroscientist Antonio Damasio discovered something surprising: patients who had damage to the emotional parts of their brain could still reason logically, but they couldn’t make decisions. They could analyze options endlessly, but never choose.
Why? Because decisions aren’t made by logic alone. They’re made when feeling collides with fact.
That’s why audiences don’t move when you only share information. Information without emotion is like a car without fuel. It looks good, but it won’t go anywhere.
Stories are the simplest way to create that fuel. They take abstract ideas and give them heartbeat.
On Giving Feedback
Years ago, I worked with a supervisor who hated giving feedback. He thought feedback was confrontation. For months, he avoided it. His team’s performance dropped. Finally, he told me about the day he overheard his staff saying, “Why doesn’t he just tell us what he wants?”
That sentence broke him.
The next day, he sat down with his team and admitted, “I was afraid of hurting you, but I realize I’ve been hurting you by staying silent.”
That moment changed the culture of his team.
Notice: the lesson isn’t complicated. Feedback matters. But because it was wrapped in a story, people remember it. They don’t just understand the principle—they feel its weight.
Exercise: Everyday Story Builder
Think of an ordinary moment from your week:
- A conversation with a colleague.
- A mistake you made.
- A small win you celebrated.
Ask yourself: What did this moment reveal about what I value?
Write it down in three parts:
- Beginning: Where were you? Who was there?
- Middle (Conflict): What was the tension, problem, or risk?
- Ending: What shifted?
This is your one-minute story. Ordinary stories, told well, become extraordinary lessons.
Clarity Creates Confidence
One of the biggest mistakes speakers make is cramming too much into a single talk. They try to cover five ideas, three frameworks, and ten lessons. Audiences leave overwhelmed and remember nothing.
Clarity begins when you reduce your message to one sentence. Ideally, less than 15 words.
Think of it as your speech’s heartbeat. Everything else supports it, but without the heartbeat, your speech dies.
- Martin Luther King Jr.: “I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up…”
- Steve Jobs: “We’re here to put a dent in the universe.”
- Brené Brown: “Vulnerability is the birthplace of connection and courage.”
One sentence. Less than 15 words. Clear. Memorable. Repeatable.
Exercise: The 15-Word Message Test
- Write your core message.
- Count the words. If more than 15, cut it down.
- Speak it out loud. Ask: Would a 12-year-old understand this?
If yes—you have clarity. If not, keep pruning.
From Eloquence to Resonance
You don’t need eloquence to move people. You need resonance.
- Before: “I must sound polished and articulate.”
- After: “I must make people feel, trust, and act.”
This is the shift from eloquence to resonance.
When you step into this identity, you stop performing. You start connecting. You stop fearing mistakes. You start focusing on meaning.
Audiences don’t need your perfection. They need your presence.
Try This Today
- Draft one short story from your own life using the Everyday Story Builder. Keep it under 90 seconds.
- Write your core message in 15 words or less.
- Say them out loud—not to impress, but to see if they land.
Notice the difference. Notice how much lighter you feel when you don’t carry the pressure of eloquence.
Because eloquence might win applause. But resonance wins hearts.
Aim to Move Someone
Think back to the speakers who shaped your life.
Were they always eloquent? Or were they authentic? Did they always use perfect sentences? Or did they share stories that made you feel something? Did they impress you with polish? Or move you with clarity?
That’s the essence of resonance.
You don’t have to be eloquent. You just have to be real. You just have to help people feel what you felt, see what you saw, and believe what you believe.
So the next time you speak—don’t aim to sound good. Aim to move someone. Because that’s what they’ll remember long after your words fade
Next: Listen Before You Speak
