Leaders are too often unaware of the impact their values have on other people’s lives. The truth is, every day they imprint their values upon their people.

For a short exercise, try to answer the following questions:

1. What kind of values and attitudes do I communicate to the people around me? Do I signal an attitude of supportiveness, confidence, commitment, mutuality, patience and involvement?
2. Which value or values do I need to add? To eliminate?

Have you ever thought about where you got your values?

In your early years, your parents, teachers and siblings were probably the people who inspired you… challenged you to go further, dream bigger, reach higher. How and what these people taught formed your values about leading and relating with people. In your middle years, usually the people who inspired you were friends, maybe people from your church or public figures or organizations to which you belonged. Your partner may have inspired you, maybe successful athletes … maybe a boss or co-worker. Maybe your mentor in Toastmasters.

When considering the people throughout your life who motivated, taught and corrected you in your many varied endeavors, you probably experienced more correcting and disciplining than praising and being told you can do or be anything you want. That is a common phenomenon in our society that children get many more don’ts than do’s, much more criticism than praises. Observe how they do teach now in schools.

This is why many participants expect me to give them a list of don’ts when I conduct workshops on presentation skills, customer service,  time management and personal effectiveness. Imagine teaching business writing without reminding them about all the don’ts. Some participants will think that you are not teaching enough. My seminar is also an opportunity to show what I value. I celebrate what people can do. I reward creativity. And when people ask me to point out the don’ts, I simply share with them what they can do next time to improve on their temporary limitations. It does not take a genius to find what is wrong with people. And it takes courage, sincerity, and small dose of wisdom to inspire people to reach for their stars.

What you value as a leader impacts your people. Some leaders don’t realize that some of their values limit them. And many of these were formed during their younger years. It is possible to replace  your limiting values with empowering ones. You can create these values for yourself (like being punctual!). Your first step is to understand that many of our values were formed by our environment since the time we learned to take in information. And that our will is more powerful that our environment.

During my workshop in Cavite on the 8 Laws of Teaching, I shared with the group that I’ve realized why teachers are very important in our lives– my junior high school teacher made the great impact on my soul. Because of her I learned that teaching is not just head to head. Teaching is heart to heart, soul to soul.

You could probably tell a story about a person from the past who made an impact on your life. Along the way, someone made a significant and positive difference in your values.

How about you? What impact do you want to make on the lives of people?

As a leader, you will show the way.

Jef Menguin is from the Philippines. He is a motivational speaker, a training consultant, an executive coach, a toastmaster, and a trying hard blogger. He specializes in leadership development, team building, customer service, coaching, and workplace communication.

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